Cloudy Day

Dear Sesame Seed,

It is hard for me to write today. Your Mama is feeling gloomy, like the cloudy, foggy sky outside. But I am going to try to write, anyway, so that I can help us both understand a little bit about what it means when I feel this way.

The other day, I had a looong conversation with a dear friend. She is going through a slump, feeling gloomy, and not understanding how to teach her students about being joyful and embracing their true selves when she herself does not feel joyful. I told her about my thoughts about being a Mama who feels all kinds of things, and how that could be a hard thing for you to see, but also a good thing. My dear Baby, I apologize in advance for what you are going to see when you come into this world. It will be mostly beautiful, but also sometimes painful. As your Mama, and as a human who feels things very deeply, I hope I can show you one way to live in this confusing world.

Sesame Seed, when  I talked to my friend K, we promised each other that we would be pioneers of a new way of being. That, instead of hiding the strong feelings we have, we would embrace them and share them, so that others could see that it's ok to feel. You, my Baby, are going to have all kinds of feelings. I don't know which ones yet, you will have your own personality with your own set of dominant feelings. But I hope, by showing you the ones that I experience, I can help you learn that all feelings are ok, and that there are ways to get through even the toughest ones.

I already love you, little one,

Your Mama